N°73 — Phone a friend

Florence, 29th April 2026, 

We don’t have any specific expertise. We’re often compared to similar helplines such as, Telefono Azzuro or Telefono Rosa, (Italian helplines for children and women in need respectively, editor’s note) which give you a line to a qualified person who tries to resolve the emergency you are calling about. We simply offer an attentive ear and the opportunity to speak openly, without pressure or judgement, about anything. And for many, this is a very precious gift.

Sixty-two years ago, a psychologist from Florence came up with the idea of setting up a listening centre where anyone could drop in and talk about whatever was on their mind. At first, it was based in a lady’s home. Her house even had a telephone – something that wasn’t all that common at the time. It was simply used as a means of contact to reach various listening groups. But it soon became the Telefono Voce Amica. And it hasn’t stopped ringing since.

We’re here to listen to everyone, every day of the year, from 4pm to 6am, even in the middle of the night. That’s our motto. Today, there are 103 of us on hand in total. We always remain anonymous and interchangeable. That’s one of our principles.

Before starting work, everyone undergo’s six months of training – a sort of induction programme during which we are presented with examples of everyday conversations. The basis of our job is to take every call, even if we’re treated badly, insulted, or told things we don’t agree with. We don’t have to share their views, of course, but we do have to listen to them. Because what interests us is the human being behind what he or she is saying.

We gain access to an incredible world and to a side of humanity that you don’t encounter in everyday life, or which is very filtered. It could be your neighbour calling, who greets you cheerfully every morning and evening, but who suffers when she’s alone at home and would never tell you. The anonymity, which exists on both sides, removes that filter.

We receive around 100,000 calls a year, which works out at about 50 to 60 per day. We each do three shifts a month: two daytime shifts and one night shift. And we never have to wait for the phone to ring. Generally, it’s only at around 4am that the volume of calls drops off a bit — those suffering from insomnia are probably just collapsing into sleep, and the early risers aren’t yet up. Then there are the regulars, those who call often, even before six o’clock. A quick ‘Hello, is everything alright?’ is often enough for them.

A typical example, would be a widow suffering from insomnia who, at 3 a.m., doesn’t know what to do. They call to try and find some comfort. There are countless people who lie awake at night for all sorts of reasons – because they have mental or physical health issues, or because they are anxious.

There are also those who call you because they’re obsessed with something, and for months on end, they keep telling you the same story over and over. Each time, we act as if it’s the first. Clearly, for reasons we’re not in a position to judge, they needed to tell you again.

It’s not necessarily people who are lonely, at least physically; they might live with their families. But perhaps the people around them avoid them because they are boring, unfriendly or aggressive. There are those who are always angry, who insult everyone, who you generally avoid in the street.

During the initial training, we learn to accept all these individual differences without taking their problems home with us. Or we try – it’s not easy for everyone, because there are also people who confide serious problems in you. You might speak to someone who has expressed suicidal thoughts, and then you hear nothing more from them. Did they go through with it or not? We’ll never know. The greatest risk, when faced with this, is letting yourself be overwhelmed by a feeling of helplessness, but we know that’s part and parcel of the job.

The anonymity means you don’t get any personal feedback, but honestly, it’s a wonderful experience. I’ve been doing it for 22 years. And it helps you, too, it allows you to get used to being more open with everyone. A colleague will say to you: Now I’ve learnt to listen to my mum when she complains, too.

Marco